Busy Mom Syndrome is my little play off of the newer conditon called BLS – Busy Life Syndrome. It’s symptoms are things like forgetting why you came into a room, not remembering people’s names and listening to someone and realizing you totally missed what they just said. Sound familiar? Of course it does because we all go through it and information overload only makes it worse!
So, the other day a client asked what my blog was about and I told them I wanted to help other busy moms find balance in their lives so they can be healthy and happy. The reply was, “Wow, do you have any tricks for not being so busy? Ah, if only…that’s the same as finding the “magic pill” for weight loss! But in reality they do have similar issues and solutions.
Like you, I run from one thing to the next, always thinking one step ahead of what needs to get done. I run into friends and aquantenances and we all say the same things, “How are you?” Good, Busy, you know…..So recently, I asked myself this question, would I really want it any other way? This life of working, running a house, spending time at the kids athletic games or school functions, seeing family & friends for dinners and outings might seem like an exhausting existence, but it can also be a blessing.
Work means I am able to provide financially for myself and my family while having an identity beyond motherhood. Running a house means I have gotten to a place in life where I can enjoy my hard work and make decisions that I own…empowerment! Time at athletic games and school functions means I have children, that were not easy to have, learning and growing as members of a team while I get the enjoyment of their academic & athletic abilities and seeing their happiness of working hard and doing well. And finally, spending time with family and friends means I have a support system that celebrates the good times and picks me up in the bad times.
You might be saying to yourself, ” way too optimistic” or “easier said then done” when life gets stressful, but this is where Mindset Strategies come in. I have been reading a lot about Abundance vs Scarcity Mindset lately and how focusing more on the first can alleviate stress and frustration in our crazy lives. With a scarcity mindset, it’s easy to focus on the negative of your current situation and feeling that there are no other options. Feelings of failure overwhelm your internal compass and can make it hard to get out of the downward spiral. Employing an abundance mindset means accepting that things might not be right in your life, but realizing there are options to change this. There are many outside factors in our lives that can distract us, focusing internally brings about an environment where we can see abundance and stop dwelling on the lack of something we desire. You start to recognize opportunities, people or resources as solutions and you start to TAKE ACTION!
For me, I try to use small things to keep me in the abundance mode.
Appreciation for where I am today and looking forward to many things ahead. The day I started babysitting, I knew I would be a mom one day. When that dream became an emotionally & physically grueling challenge(infertility, IVF’s and a miscarriage at 28 weeks), I was resentful and depressed. But through support and a positive approach, I was able to overcome and have 2 healthy kids.
Hanging out with others that have an abundance attitude. There is nothing better than having friends, co-workers, and mentors that display real life examples of all the “great” there is in the world. If they can do it, why not you? It’s good to have a friend or two that you can share with or just plain old “bitch” with, but it’s even better when you have someone you admire help you work through issues and find opportunities for success.
Searching out personal development resources via the internet and books. This is where I am living right now!!!! In my full time job, I have done many personality and character tests that help to determine how I work in certain situations and with certain teammates. But recently I have expanded my development and focused more on me as an indiviual, mother, wife, etc. There are so many resources out there and info overload can actually backfire on you, so choose one or two things to work on at a time. Choose a personality trait that you know is slightly lacking, but that is totally achievable in the short term and get that down before you attack the next one.
Finally, Accepting who you are and what makes you happy and then making choices for yourself that feed your passions. Based on my above mentioned tests, I’m an Activator, an Influencer and a Dominant personality. When I hear a good idea or cause, I want to dive in and Get It Done! Helping others find motivation and energy to be their best charges me up and makes me happy. Being a little bold and up front is also me! I have learned that saying “no” to things that are worthy causes or helpful to others is not a bad thing. Choosing “yes” for things that you are passionate about end up better in the long run because it makes you happy and successful.
“Busy” is a state of mind and can be viewed differently from person to person. Make peace with what you NEED to do vs. what you WANT to do and find a balance. The things you NEED to do might be easier if you rethink how you are doing them. For instance, grocery shopping is a task many feel is a chore and time sucker. Ever consider a delivery or pick up option? We all have staples that we buy each week and ordering online frees up time we could spend doing other things….cooking healthier meals maybe? Things you WANT are just as important. If it’s spending more time with your spouse or finding time for just you, schedule it and prepare ahead of time. It will give you something to look forward too and decrease stress with last minute planning when you have hit your max stress level.
From an exercise standpoint, activities that help lower your cortisol levels(our stress hormone) like leisurely walks(not power walks), yoga or meditation can be helpful. Other activities like reading a book, staring into your baby/child’s eyes (research proven) and listening to them or watching a funny movie can do wonders also. Take a break from digital sources and get quality sleep. There are nutritional aspects to consider also. Increase your intake of nutrients that improve brain functioning and adrenal health,Vitamin B,C,D & E for example. Being busy often means eating on the run and we all know there are not many great food options that can fuel our day, “on the run.” Eat a good breakfast with protein & fat to keep you satisfied, then bring along food for the rest of the day, so you’re not caught off guard and STARVING!
So the next time someone asks, “How are you?”, give them something positive back. Tell them your busy, but happy, because you are focusing on things you really enjoy and realizing the blessings of a life full of opportunity.